The Curious Case of the Missing Super Mario Bros Game: Where is the Surprise?

What was left for ‘Super Mario Bros’ to conquer the world completely? It is one of the most recognizable characters worldwide, its movie is the only one of the year that has surpassed one billion dollars in box office revenue, and there isn’t a single piece of merchandise, from folders to lunch boxes, official cosplays, and, of course, all kinds of video games, that doesn’t feature his mustache front and center. There was only one castle left to conquer: the Oreo cookie castle.

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Yummy-mia!

Said and done: Oreo has prepared a limited edition packaging with 16 different designs based on the Italian plumber and his companions. We’ll have everyone from the typical allies to enemies like Boos, Koopa Troopers, Piranha Plants, and objects like the mushroom, the fire flower, or the super star, and of course, Bowser. It would be great if the filling of these cookies were peach-flavored, paying homage to ‘Peaches,’ but we’re not expecting miracles. In fact, Peach is nowhere to be found, sadly. And neither is Waluigi. They’re cowards.

The craze has been such that, although they will be available in stores, Nintendo has already proposed pre-ordering them, as if it were the new ‘Super Mario Bros Wonder.’ Just think about it: you’re pre-ordering… Oreo cookies. Yet, not only the good-hearted people eager to have fun have done it, but also the Usual Suspects. I mean, those who want to ruin the good vibes by reselling the cookies at impossible prices.

More specifically, on eBay, they were found for up to $75, an absurd amount considering that they were already on sale, and paying that price only meant getting the pack a couple of days earlier. Oh well.

Earlier, we mentioned that Peach doesn’t appear on the cookies, and there’s a reason for that: Bowser has kidnapped her again. No, this is not a joke, it was stated in the official press release along with a game you can play by scanning a QR code. And if you ask us, it’s not on par with ‘Super Mario Odyssey’: it involves stacking as many hero cookies as possible on top of a Bowser cookie on the edge of a glass of milk until he is defeated. In other words, making him fall into the glass. Uh.

Oreo promises big surprises for those who defeat Bowser, but it feels like stretching it too far. We were already fully on board with “Mario Oreo cookies.” By the way, there is still no news of their arrival in Spain, but considering that they are being sold as collector’s items, disregarding their expiration date, don’t be surprised if they show up in various places at the next Expomanga. Mamma mia!

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